Not late December back in 63........Savannah is sick yet again. Cold, runny eyes.........Still on antibiotics which is good. I'm extremely irritated she is sick again. I got a bad headache the other day, my dizzys came back........ I feel like I'm in a weird bubble and very dizzy. So last night I was so scared from being so dizzy, Kyle was up with a severe migraine..........It was crazy last night. I don't think either of us slept much at all. I feel like I am getting a cold as well. Nose is stopped up and my eyes feel heavy. If I had the patience to homeschool, I think I would.
Just an update. Nothing has changed. I go to Dr. Tomorrow then the vertigo Dr on the 29th. It seems like it's going by so slow. I want this GONE!
Happy Tuesday
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Tagged by Melzie
I was tagged by Melzie and this is a hard one....... Owooooo!
The rules of this are:
1. Link the person who has tagged you.
2. Tell seven true things about yourself.
3. Tag seven new people.
4. Leave a message with the person you have tagged so they know about it. I am supposed to name seven truths about myself............. and tag seven new people.
* I am very insecure in all areas in my life.
* I love new boxes of Kleenexs and Decorated paper towels
* Music is the heart of who I am. I have a song for everything, a song for everyone and it is something that I relate to and can express through music, what I can't express through words.
* I want to learn to play the piano
* I rarely let anyone totally in......Always keep them at a distance. Kyle knows this one quite well. Protection mechanism I guess.
* I am excellent at keeping secrets. I have some I have never ever told anyone for 15 years or more :)
* I am one of the best friends anyone could have. I wish I had myself as a neighbor LOL :P I am fun, I have a good time. I am loyal. I give good advice most of the time. I totally admit when I am wrong and I love my friends deeply. Would do anything I Could for them and they all know that.
Tagging 7 people Sheesh mel you hogged anyone who would do it LOL!!
My 7 people are any 7 who stop by here and want to do this. If you do be sure to leave me a comment so I can come read what you wrote! :) Gonna add Melzies other tag to the bottom of this one. I have been a bit lame on doing them. So here's number 2
THE POWER OF 2
Melzie tagged me for this one...
Two Names You Go By:
1. Dianna
2. Dizie Wizie - Thanks to my Melzie Welzie
Two Things you are wearing right now:
1. Tshirt
2. Underwear
Two Things you would want (or have) in a relationship:
1. Love
2. Laughter
Two Things you like to do:
1. Write
2. Photography
Two Things you want very badly at this moment:
1. Ice
2. about 1000 bucks just to blow on clothes and shoes
Two Things you did last night:
1. Played Toontown
2. Cried alot
Two Things you ate today:
1. Haven't eaten yet
2. water
Two People you spoke last to:
1. Mare
2. Gay
Two Things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Working for a couple of hours
2. Probably cleaning at some point
Two Longest car rides:
1. From KY to San Antonio
2. From KY to NYC
Two Favorite holidays:
1. Halloween
2. Christmas
Two Favorite beverages:
1. Water
2. Occasionally sprite or 7 up
Two Jobs I have had in my life:
1. Hairdresser
2. Photographer
Two Movies I would watch over and over:
1. Bridges of Madison County
2. Blades of Glory
Two Places I have lived:
1. San Antonio TX
2. Alexandria VA
Two of My Favorite foods:
1. Broccoli
2. Cabbage
Two Places I'd rather be right now:
1. Ocean, don't care where, just at an ocean
2. Back in bed sleeping
Two People I think will do this meme:
1. Mel
2. Mandy
Happy Sunday!
The rules of this are:
1. Link the person who has tagged you.
2. Tell seven true things about yourself.
3. Tag seven new people.
4. Leave a message with the person you have tagged so they know about it. I am supposed to name seven truths about myself............. and tag seven new people.
* I am very insecure in all areas in my life.
* I love new boxes of Kleenexs and Decorated paper towels
* Music is the heart of who I am. I have a song for everything, a song for everyone and it is something that I relate to and can express through music, what I can't express through words.
* I want to learn to play the piano
* I rarely let anyone totally in......Always keep them at a distance. Kyle knows this one quite well. Protection mechanism I guess.
* I am excellent at keeping secrets. I have some I have never ever told anyone for 15 years or more :)
* I am one of the best friends anyone could have. I wish I had myself as a neighbor LOL :P I am fun, I have a good time. I am loyal. I give good advice most of the time. I totally admit when I am wrong and I love my friends deeply. Would do anything I Could for them and they all know that.
Tagging 7 people Sheesh mel you hogged anyone who would do it LOL!!
My 7 people are any 7 who stop by here and want to do this. If you do be sure to leave me a comment so I can come read what you wrote! :) Gonna add Melzies other tag to the bottom of this one. I have been a bit lame on doing them. So here's number 2
THE POWER OF 2
Melzie tagged me for this one...
Two Names You Go By:
1. Dianna
2. Dizie Wizie - Thanks to my Melzie Welzie
Two Things you are wearing right now:
1. Tshirt
2. Underwear
Two Things you would want (or have) in a relationship:
1. Love
2. Laughter
Two Things you like to do:
1. Write
2. Photography
Two Things you want very badly at this moment:
1. Ice
2. about 1000 bucks just to blow on clothes and shoes
Two Things you did last night:
1. Played Toontown
2. Cried alot
Two Things you ate today:
1. Haven't eaten yet
2. water
Two People you spoke last to:
1. Mare
2. Gay
Two Things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Working for a couple of hours
2. Probably cleaning at some point
Two Longest car rides:
1. From KY to San Antonio
2. From KY to NYC
Two Favorite holidays:
1. Halloween
2. Christmas
Two Favorite beverages:
1. Water
2. Occasionally sprite or 7 up
Two Jobs I have had in my life:
1. Hairdresser
2. Photographer
Two Movies I would watch over and over:
1. Bridges of Madison County
2. Blades of Glory
Two Places I have lived:
1. San Antonio TX
2. Alexandria VA
Two of My Favorite foods:
1. Broccoli
2. Cabbage
Two Places I'd rather be right now:
1. Ocean, don't care where, just at an ocean
2. Back in bed sleeping
Two People I think will do this meme:
1. Mel
2. Mandy
Happy Sunday!
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Saturday Where to start?
This is going to be long. This is going to be a long vent. If you are offended by any of it, I suggest you turn back and stop reading here.
Today was my free day. I looked forward to it all week. Kyle was taking the kids and going to spend the day down in Bowling Green. I am way behind on my job and I was going to use today to catch up and finish.
Fridays, I have severe anxiety. I cannot help that I do. Every Friday for 3 weeks I have severe dizziness and shakiness and I have panic attacks. The sad part is, is because everyone is going to be home. Saturdays, Kyle and I fight, Kyle and Anthony argue and Savannah cries. This morning, I got to sleep in some. Kyle got up went to store and got home, I was at the table doing my work and almost as if it dropped out of the sky.........Arguing. I do NOT want to argue. So Savannah starts getting in the middle of us arguing. Hearing all these things that we are saying to each other which are not nice. She hears us talking about which one of us moves out, which one of this does this or that. This cannot be healthy for anyone. I tell Kyle this needs to stop NOW, and of course I go on to say......Dollars to doughnuts Juan is upstairs hearing all of this, his anxiety is going to flair and he will not go on this trip. Kyle goes to get him up...........He is curled up under a blanket and will not get up to go on trip.
Kyle and Anthony start arguing........Savannah is whining. I am at my wits end. Completely and totally at my wits end. I won't go into detail at the extent of Kyles and my problems on my blog. It's not fair to those who do not know the whole situation. Those who need to know what's going on. Know.
I tried to explain to Kyle this morning that all of this is not fair. NONE OF IT is fair. This is hurting the kids. Savannah will NOT leave us alone for 2 seconds and I honestly feel it's because everytime she walks away, Kyle and I try to discuss what's going on and it starts arguing. That is too much for a 5 year old girl to take on her shoulders. She should be enjoying her life, not playing peacemaker for her mom and dad. Juan is severely anxious and insecure.....I am angry. I am so angry sometimes that I feel like taking a sledge hammer and just busting something up. I am extremely pissed at Brett for dying and leaving me to raise a child alone. I'm extremely pissed at Bretts family for NEVER EVER offering to help me out. They ALL just dropped off the face of the earth and ditched him. How hard is it to call somebody? How hard is it to pick up a F*cking phone and say at least how are you? Put your own selfish needs aside and think of him. Since Brett never worked Anthony didn't get a dime of social security. I have struggled since I was 18 years old to raise him with the only help coming from my mother, my father, Juan and Kyle. It wasn't even Juans and Kyles responsibility to help with him. You all should've at least offered to help some way. But no. I hope you are happy with those decisions. Then we move on to Juan.........Oh Geez he has been the hardest of all my kids to raise. I am worn out and can not even delve into how tired I am of this situation. I am angry at him for not going......I am angry that every day it's a struggle with im. I am tired and I need a break.
Savannah does not leave my side. She will not play in her room....she will not play outside........she has to sit constantly in between me and Kyle. That is so sad it's unreal. Kyle and I do not sleep together. We do not eat together. We do not speak unless it's to argue and in which case the kids are right there.
I am the only person in this house with a level head who is realistic about this whole situation and how bad it is here. I think that drastic changes need to be made, no matter who feels what. I think our own personal feelings to be set aside and think about the kids.
I myself need a break. I need to be removed from all of this and I need help. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to fix any of this and most importantly I don't know how to repair the damage that it is doing to the kids. So I am asking for help. I am admitting to the fullest extent that I need advice. I need help. I will add do not say in your advice that Kyle and I need to quit arguing, because I totally know this already and we have tried and it's impossible. So outside of that lay it on me what anyone has to offer. I am all ears. If you don't want to comment here, email me. Call me. Take me away.........
Happy Saturday.
Today was my free day. I looked forward to it all week. Kyle was taking the kids and going to spend the day down in Bowling Green. I am way behind on my job and I was going to use today to catch up and finish.
Fridays, I have severe anxiety. I cannot help that I do. Every Friday for 3 weeks I have severe dizziness and shakiness and I have panic attacks. The sad part is, is because everyone is going to be home. Saturdays, Kyle and I fight, Kyle and Anthony argue and Savannah cries. This morning, I got to sleep in some. Kyle got up went to store and got home, I was at the table doing my work and almost as if it dropped out of the sky.........Arguing. I do NOT want to argue. So Savannah starts getting in the middle of us arguing. Hearing all these things that we are saying to each other which are not nice. She hears us talking about which one of us moves out, which one of this does this or that. This cannot be healthy for anyone. I tell Kyle this needs to stop NOW, and of course I go on to say......Dollars to doughnuts Juan is upstairs hearing all of this, his anxiety is going to flair and he will not go on this trip. Kyle goes to get him up...........He is curled up under a blanket and will not get up to go on trip.
Kyle and Anthony start arguing........Savannah is whining. I am at my wits end. Completely and totally at my wits end. I won't go into detail at the extent of Kyles and my problems on my blog. It's not fair to those who do not know the whole situation. Those who need to know what's going on. Know.
I tried to explain to Kyle this morning that all of this is not fair. NONE OF IT is fair. This is hurting the kids. Savannah will NOT leave us alone for 2 seconds and I honestly feel it's because everytime she walks away, Kyle and I try to discuss what's going on and it starts arguing. That is too much for a 5 year old girl to take on her shoulders. She should be enjoying her life, not playing peacemaker for her mom and dad. Juan is severely anxious and insecure.....I am angry. I am so angry sometimes that I feel like taking a sledge hammer and just busting something up. I am extremely pissed at Brett for dying and leaving me to raise a child alone. I'm extremely pissed at Bretts family for NEVER EVER offering to help me out. They ALL just dropped off the face of the earth and ditched him. How hard is it to call somebody? How hard is it to pick up a F*cking phone and say at least how are you? Put your own selfish needs aside and think of him. Since Brett never worked Anthony didn't get a dime of social security. I have struggled since I was 18 years old to raise him with the only help coming from my mother, my father, Juan and Kyle. It wasn't even Juans and Kyles responsibility to help with him. You all should've at least offered to help some way. But no. I hope you are happy with those decisions. Then we move on to Juan.........Oh Geez he has been the hardest of all my kids to raise. I am worn out and can not even delve into how tired I am of this situation. I am angry at him for not going......I am angry that every day it's a struggle with im. I am tired and I need a break.
Savannah does not leave my side. She will not play in her room....she will not play outside........she has to sit constantly in between me and Kyle. That is so sad it's unreal. Kyle and I do not sleep together. We do not eat together. We do not speak unless it's to argue and in which case the kids are right there.
I am the only person in this house with a level head who is realistic about this whole situation and how bad it is here. I think that drastic changes need to be made, no matter who feels what. I think our own personal feelings to be set aside and think about the kids.
I myself need a break. I need to be removed from all of this and I need help. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to fix any of this and most importantly I don't know how to repair the damage that it is doing to the kids. So I am asking for help. I am admitting to the fullest extent that I need advice. I need help. I will add do not say in your advice that Kyle and I need to quit arguing, because I totally know this already and we have tried and it's impossible. So outside of that lay it on me what anyone has to offer. I am all ears. If you don't want to comment here, email me. Call me. Take me away.........
Happy Saturday.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
What the Sam hills going on here?
Okay........ Tuesday I had to work all day, come home do my letter writing thing. I figured I earned some internet time. I get on computer for just a few minutes. Maybe 30 or so and the whole thing crashes. So for 2 days I basically have no computer. I clean the house, work some. I start enjoying the no stress from not having the internet. No drama. Last night I really start missing it. Got really frustrated etc. So, I wake up this morning Kyle tells me computer is fixed. I get Savannah ready for school and sit down to check my email.....Got a couple of messages sent out, the flickr, flickr.........A car hit a Telephone pole and our electricity went out block wide. I was like okay.......today is going to be bad like yesterday. With no electricity, there is nothing to do. I couldn't do my work because I can't see to get the right papers. I can't clean cause it's not really dirty. I mulled over taking a nice long bath. There's no windows in there so I go and grab me some candles. I get settled in the tub, lay back and close my eyes. At this point, I feel every inch of tension drain right away. I'm laying there to the point of where you are almost asleep but not quite.....Ahhhhhhhh.......Don't you freaking know the power came back on, Loud fans, bright lights and about scared the living daylights out of me. Scared me to death. So I get mad and just get out of the tub. Decide to go cook. I get my cabbage all cut up. Cabbage is my favorite and I have been wanting some forever. So....... it's cooking smelling great. I get out the sausage, cut it up and add it.....It was expired! We just got it, it was expired from July. I was so mad, that is ruined, lunch gone. I sign on to the computer and get Message after message of drama that happened while I was away and people couldn't wait to tell me! Sad thing is some of it hurts my feelings. Me n the dogs walked a mile. My day has gone bad. I should stay in the house today. Wizard of Oz line sums it all up "I'd turn back if I were you"
Happy Thursday, glad to be back online I think.
Happy Thursday, glad to be back online I think.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
What the ?????????
So it's about 5 am....... I am blissfully sleeping my wee little heart out. Me and Savannah were in basement. Kyle was upstairs......Get the vision? Okay, So I feel someone start pressing on my chest almost like they are trying to bounce me on the bed. I get my wits about me think, am I dying, someone doing CPR On me??? I open my eyes and there stands Kyle in my face and let me quote this exactly "Dianna, don't get up, Someones on the back porch, I think they are taking things"
Okay, it's always good to wake up a panic attacker like that! So, I say "What" he said he had called the cops, he could hear someone on the back porch and sounds like they were into stuff. For those of you who don't know, we have that big Florida room thats also a dining room, sun porch type deal.
I had let the dogs out late and the acorns pounding on the roof scared me and I ran in and forgot to lock the door. Owooooo. So I am laying there and Kyle goes to sit down and I said ummmmmmmmmmmm Boys are 2 floors up and I know I'm not going up there. So he creeps 1 by 1 up the steps.
Don't you know it took the cops over 10 minutes to get here. That is part of the house, I mean, it wouldn't take much to get into our main house.
So, the cops looked around for awhile and Kyle said it didn't look like anything was missing. But the thought of someone being in my house, I feel kinda violated.
I'm skeered to go out there.
Geez, I can laugh it off a bit now at the thinking someone was doing CPR on me and the way I was woken up.
Then I got on Kyle, I wasn't planning on waking up and going upstairs, why'd you wake me up. He was like, well would you of rather of me not told you? That's a hard question for sure. Need to make a mental note to deeply think that if next time a burglar is in my home, do I want to be woken up? What about you guys, what would you do? You know, if my life was drama free, I don't know what I would do. Sure wish it would come on!
Savannahs feeling much, much better. She said she can't hear out of that ear. That has me concerned but from what I understand when your drum ruptures you do lose hearing for awhile. :( It's bugging her, she has asked me several times If I could turn her ear back on. Okay..... That's my drama at 6:30, I wanna go back, back, back to bed again. Whoaaa, whoaaaaaa I gotta gooooooo back to bed!!!! Again!
I'll take a rain check on the CPR and burglars!
Happy Tuesday
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Sunday
Happy Sunday Morning. Savannah is doing some better I guess. She didn't scream alot like she did Friday night. She only woke up screaming a couple times. She is still running a fever. She is also still asleep.
Not much else to write about.
We haven't been able to go out of the house on a weekend since school started. I'm hoping that I can take her to the zoo next weekend. Keeping my fingers crossed.
Not much else to write about.
We haven't been able to go out of the house on a weekend since school started. I'm hoping that I can take her to the zoo next weekend. Keeping my fingers crossed.
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Good freaking Grief
Every Saturday since August Savannah has been sick. Don't you know that at 1:30 am last night she woke up with a blood curdling scream and I instantly recognized it....... Ear pain. Gave her some motrin, she screamed and screamed til she fell asleep. Again at 3 am blood curdling scream. Gave her some tylenol and she cried back to sleep. Then she woke up again an hour ago screaming. She has a Dr appt at 10:10. As a parent there is nothing more frustrating than having your child scream in pain and there is absolutely nothing you can do to help it. I have held her basically all night. Rocked her, put a warm towel on my chest and have her lay on it. Nothing eases ear pain. I'm about in tears because I know it hurts her so bad and I can't help her. She just lays there and whimpers. I'm sad. The wait til the Dr appt is going to be long. :( Motrin and Tylenol aren't helping. I don't know what to do. Kyle and I already crossed nice paths already this morning. I can't deal with arguing today on top of the other stufff.
You know I pray alot for answers and I pray alot for help and nothing gets better, things just only get worse. How do you get answers out of things getting worse? Mel you are my spiritual guru........How do you get your answers on what to do?
I don't need to turn over a new leaf, I need to turn over a whole tree. Quickly.
I will update you guys on my baby girl, but I know it is an ear infection. She had so many as a baby, thats a scream one doesn't forget.
So Linney and Jay make a mental note that if baby Evangeline screams and you can't console her, it's probably her ears. I hope she never ever gets to the ear infection point. It's a long road.
Happy Saturday. Pray for my sweet lil angel.
** a lil update....... well we took her to the Dr and he looked in her ear and her right ear drum was very infected and bulging. I asked him for the pain drops and he said that the drops would cause it to rupture because it was so badly infected. So she screams most of the way home. Kyle and I are into a heated discussion that didn't lead anywhere nicely.........More screaming, more crying. We get home and she is literally screaming and kicking begging for us to make it stop. I was beyond frustrated. I had to get out of the house, took a nice long walk. Came home and she started really screaming again, worse. Then she said her ear felt wet and I am thinking her ear drum busted. That really is the worst pain I have ever seen her in. Never have I seen her be uncomfortable to that extent. Heartwrenching. I am so exhausted that I could just go to sleep here at the computer. I'm hoping that she is able to sleep. Being up all night is not an easy task.
Thanks for your prayers and for asking how she is.
Love
Dianna
You know I pray alot for answers and I pray alot for help and nothing gets better, things just only get worse. How do you get answers out of things getting worse? Mel you are my spiritual guru........How do you get your answers on what to do?
I don't need to turn over a new leaf, I need to turn over a whole tree. Quickly.
I will update you guys on my baby girl, but I know it is an ear infection. She had so many as a baby, thats a scream one doesn't forget.
So Linney and Jay make a mental note that if baby Evangeline screams and you can't console her, it's probably her ears. I hope she never ever gets to the ear infection point. It's a long road.
Happy Saturday. Pray for my sweet lil angel.
** a lil update....... well we took her to the Dr and he looked in her ear and her right ear drum was very infected and bulging. I asked him for the pain drops and he said that the drops would cause it to rupture because it was so badly infected. So she screams most of the way home. Kyle and I are into a heated discussion that didn't lead anywhere nicely.........More screaming, more crying. We get home and she is literally screaming and kicking begging for us to make it stop. I was beyond frustrated. I had to get out of the house, took a nice long walk. Came home and she started really screaming again, worse. Then she said her ear felt wet and I am thinking her ear drum busted. That really is the worst pain I have ever seen her in. Never have I seen her be uncomfortable to that extent. Heartwrenching. I am so exhausted that I could just go to sleep here at the computer. I'm hoping that she is able to sleep. Being up all night is not an easy task.
Thanks for your prayers and for asking how she is.
Love
Dianna
Friday, October 05, 2007
Friends
I have a friend we will call her Melzie :) She has a monologue. I don't know exactly what I did in this life to deserve her, but I am sure glad that I have her.
She knows that I am having major troubles in my life. She always offers a smile for me, an ear for me a whoagrl for me.
She is always sending me cards in the mail, always so sweet and just to let me know she is thinking of me and cares about me.
Today I was having a rough day, weekends are very tough for me. I go to my mailbox and of course there's yet another card from her.
I got all misty eyed and I truly again ask what did I ever do in life to deserve her?
She treats me with kindness, compassion and respect and I have no doubts at all in my head that she loves me.
I don't find that very often. I just can't understand why God takes all these people I Love and places them so far away.
I Hope to see you again soon Melody. You are truly my best friend and I have nothing but total love for you.
I love you very much!
She knows that I am having major troubles in my life. She always offers a smile for me, an ear for me a whoagrl for me.
She is always sending me cards in the mail, always so sweet and just to let me know she is thinking of me and cares about me.
Today I was having a rough day, weekends are very tough for me. I go to my mailbox and of course there's yet another card from her.
I got all misty eyed and I truly again ask what did I ever do in life to deserve her?
She treats me with kindness, compassion and respect and I have no doubts at all in my head that she loves me.
I don't find that very often. I just can't understand why God takes all these people I Love and places them so far away.
I Hope to see you again soon Melody. You are truly my best friend and I have nothing but total love for you.
I love you very much!
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Happy Ummmmmmm Thursday!
I can't believe it's Thursday already! Juan has went to school all this week :) Things are back to normal. I know they can easily change, so I'll take it one day at a time, but YAY!
Opie is very ill. He's at the vets this morning. :( He wouldn't get up off the couch and those of you who come to my house, know that he is extremely wild!
:( so that stinks. Worried about him. Claire seems to be healed up.
Ummmmmmm Savannah is not sick this week. I'm not sick this week. Wait! Let me go outside to make sure sky is not falling down LOL
Watched Ghost Hunters last night and OMG those EVPs were amazing!!!!! They actually made my hair stand on end! I loveeeee that show! I get a tiny bit freaked watching it at night, but scares like that are sometimes good. I am still thinking Owooooo over those EVPs! Steve looked hot as always. ::Swoon:: He will always be my top celebrity crush. Sorry Sawyer. Sawyer, who's that? LOST hasn't been on in so long I forgot what he looked like. It's sad that in the time that show took hiatus I could've had a full term pregnancy. That's nuts!
Hmmm what else........Nothing I suppose. Going to my moms this morning, pay hommage to the pool that is all closed up. Such a sad sight from her back window.
I vote next year the whole family gets into bikinis and we really have a pool party. I would of course be taking all the pics :P We can do this!!! LOL
I can see all my aunts cringing right now!!
So, I'm off, I'll update you on the little furry love of my life when he gets home. He's dehydrated :(
Have a Happy Thursday, be safe, wear seatbelts and remember that only YOU can prevent forest fires.
XO XO to all.
Opie is very ill. He's at the vets this morning. :( He wouldn't get up off the couch and those of you who come to my house, know that he is extremely wild!
:( so that stinks. Worried about him. Claire seems to be healed up.
Ummmmmmm Savannah is not sick this week. I'm not sick this week. Wait! Let me go outside to make sure sky is not falling down LOL
Watched Ghost Hunters last night and OMG those EVPs were amazing!!!!! They actually made my hair stand on end! I loveeeee that show! I get a tiny bit freaked watching it at night, but scares like that are sometimes good. I am still thinking Owooooo over those EVPs! Steve looked hot as always. ::Swoon:: He will always be my top celebrity crush. Sorry Sawyer. Sawyer, who's that? LOST hasn't been on in so long I forgot what he looked like. It's sad that in the time that show took hiatus I could've had a full term pregnancy. That's nuts!
Hmmm what else........Nothing I suppose. Going to my moms this morning, pay hommage to the pool that is all closed up. Such a sad sight from her back window.
I vote next year the whole family gets into bikinis and we really have a pool party. I would of course be taking all the pics :P We can do this!!! LOL
I can see all my aunts cringing right now!!
So, I'm off, I'll update you on the little furry love of my life when he gets home. He's dehydrated :(
Have a Happy Thursday, be safe, wear seatbelts and remember that only YOU can prevent forest fires.
XO XO to all.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
GRRRRRR to Frito Lay
I hate this Celiacs thing. For 2 weeks now, I have been feeling sick to my stomach and my face has a rash on one side. Usually that's a sign of Gluten, but I haven't been eating anything different. Same stuff I have been eating for years.
I have been feeling weak and achey like I did when I first got this disease.
Sooooooooo I decided to recomb over my diet.
I have been eating Barbeque Chips for 3 years. Same chips and I knew they were gluten free.
Well..................3 mos ago they changed the recipe and now add Barley flour. That explains a WHOLE, WHOLE Lot. The funny thing is they don't list gluten on their package and by law now they have too. Barley contains gluten and they should be placing that on their packaging. So now it will take 6 mos for my stomach to heal, my rash on my face to go away and to get straightened out.
You know, you can't trust anything anymore. Nothing at all. Good Grief
I have been feeling weak and achey like I did when I first got this disease.
Sooooooooo I decided to recomb over my diet.
I have been eating Barbeque Chips for 3 years. Same chips and I knew they were gluten free.
Well..................3 mos ago they changed the recipe and now add Barley flour. That explains a WHOLE, WHOLE Lot. The funny thing is they don't list gluten on their package and by law now they have too. Barley contains gluten and they should be placing that on their packaging. So now it will take 6 mos for my stomach to heal, my rash on my face to go away and to get straightened out.
You know, you can't trust anything anymore. Nothing at all. Good Grief
Monday, October 01, 2007
Oh boy, it's Monday alright
Was so hectic here this morning. Claire is still sick, Opie is now sick. So for those of you who do not have dogs, what that entails is every single hour forcing yourself to get up, every hour and let the dogs out. Take them a good 20 minutes out there. Then let them back in. Hour later again.
Savannah woke up achey this morning coughing and hacking. I woke up this morning coughing very badly. Something popped into my head that maybe we have mold from where the air conditioner leaked in the basement. Maybe that could be the problem. I'm moving up to Savannahs room. Going to get me a better mattress for her bed and just sleep in there. Take her with me!
Juan missed the bus this morning, but we got him to school. Savannah almost missed the bus, but I hurried as fast as I could!
I scrubbed the living room this morning. It's so nice looking! I used vinegar on the living room and it looks so nice! Kitchen is almost clean. Then I'm not going to clean anymore today. I'll clean again tomorrow.
I feel like we got jipped on weather. I keep waiting for those cold spells. Patiently waiting. Saturday it's supposed to be 90. So what that means here in the Ohio valley is that come October it will just get cold. No nice weather to enjoy. I want some 70s some window open days.
Been doing alot of soul searching lately on what I want. I come up empty alot. I think to myself can we really have this much stress. Yes. Just too much.
Sad to say I was relieved when everyone walked out the door this morning. I cleaned in quiet. I need more quiet!
I wasted my 20s. They were totally ruined for me. My first 5 of 30 were pretty ruined. I want to set some goals about not wasting anymore time. That's hard to do when you are stuck. I feel like I'm neck deep in quicksand. Sometimes I get close to going under, sometimes I can get out to my waist. Then I sink, come up again. Over and over same process. I want my life out of the quicksand. I want peace, quiet and happiness. Do you think joining a monastery would be too extreme? They don't talk right? They sing, hum and pray. I think they make chocolate and cheese. I could do all those things. Any close by? Anyone know?
Oh well, I'll google the monk thing :P
Happy Monday.
Savannah woke up achey this morning coughing and hacking. I woke up this morning coughing very badly. Something popped into my head that maybe we have mold from where the air conditioner leaked in the basement. Maybe that could be the problem. I'm moving up to Savannahs room. Going to get me a better mattress for her bed and just sleep in there. Take her with me!
Juan missed the bus this morning, but we got him to school. Savannah almost missed the bus, but I hurried as fast as I could!
I scrubbed the living room this morning. It's so nice looking! I used vinegar on the living room and it looks so nice! Kitchen is almost clean. Then I'm not going to clean anymore today. I'll clean again tomorrow.
I feel like we got jipped on weather. I keep waiting for those cold spells. Patiently waiting. Saturday it's supposed to be 90. So what that means here in the Ohio valley is that come October it will just get cold. No nice weather to enjoy. I want some 70s some window open days.
Been doing alot of soul searching lately on what I want. I come up empty alot. I think to myself can we really have this much stress. Yes. Just too much.
Sad to say I was relieved when everyone walked out the door this morning. I cleaned in quiet. I need more quiet!
I wasted my 20s. They were totally ruined for me. My first 5 of 30 were pretty ruined. I want to set some goals about not wasting anymore time. That's hard to do when you are stuck. I feel like I'm neck deep in quicksand. Sometimes I get close to going under, sometimes I can get out to my waist. Then I sink, come up again. Over and over same process. I want my life out of the quicksand. I want peace, quiet and happiness. Do you think joining a monastery would be too extreme? They don't talk right? They sing, hum and pray. I think they make chocolate and cheese. I could do all those things. Any close by? Anyone know?
Oh well, I'll google the monk thing :P
Happy Monday.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
It's Sunday
So was Savannah sick this weekend????? YES! She threw up last night and was very sick to her stomach :(
I am not liking the school thing. Hopefully with the 4 day weekend soon, she has time to completely get well!
We are trying to coax Anthony to get a job. He said he doesn't want to spend his free time working. Had a 30 minute argument about how he has to go to school and that is job enough and it will waste his childhood getting a job.
I told him that if he wants to have his girlfriend a nice Christmas present, he really better start thinking seriously about a job. I tried to get him to apply for the zoos Halloween Party, tried for a snack bar attendant at the pool. Fun jobs. He wants no part of it. Dunno what other option to explore there. I think a job will really help him. Juan will have no problem getting a job, he's out mowing yards and all sorts of stuff for money.
Who knows! Boys.
Claire has been very sick all weekend.
Friday I was sitting on the couch, got up and got the worst dizzy spell I have ever in my life had. I was so ill, my arms hurt, my legs were weak. I laid in the basement and cried because I was so scared. Kyle got Savannah off the bus and took her to dance class. Yesterday as the 24 hr mark hit, it magically disappeared. Prayers lots of prayers and I think it was the virus Savannah had last week when she said she felt wiggly.
What do kindergarteners do in their class to get all these germs. Do they chew on crayons? Do they put their hands in their mouths? I knew she would be sick, I counted on it. But good grief. I didn't know every single week she would be bringing home everything.
Kinda scary.
Today I am cleaning and thats about it.
Happy Sunday
I am not liking the school thing. Hopefully with the 4 day weekend soon, she has time to completely get well!
We are trying to coax Anthony to get a job. He said he doesn't want to spend his free time working. Had a 30 minute argument about how he has to go to school and that is job enough and it will waste his childhood getting a job.
I told him that if he wants to have his girlfriend a nice Christmas present, he really better start thinking seriously about a job. I tried to get him to apply for the zoos Halloween Party, tried for a snack bar attendant at the pool. Fun jobs. He wants no part of it. Dunno what other option to explore there. I think a job will really help him. Juan will have no problem getting a job, he's out mowing yards and all sorts of stuff for money.
Who knows! Boys.
Claire has been very sick all weekend.
Friday I was sitting on the couch, got up and got the worst dizzy spell I have ever in my life had. I was so ill, my arms hurt, my legs were weak. I laid in the basement and cried because I was so scared. Kyle got Savannah off the bus and took her to dance class. Yesterday as the 24 hr mark hit, it magically disappeared. Prayers lots of prayers and I think it was the virus Savannah had last week when she said she felt wiggly.
What do kindergarteners do in their class to get all these germs. Do they chew on crayons? Do they put their hands in their mouths? I knew she would be sick, I counted on it. But good grief. I didn't know every single week she would be bringing home everything.
Kinda scary.
Today I am cleaning and thats about it.
Happy Sunday
Friday, September 28, 2007
2 Full days
Juan has gotten up and ridden the bus to school and spent FULL DAYS! :)
I don't want to jinx myself, but YAY!!! :)
His dad has been sending him messages every morning to motivate him and it really is helping him.
Sooooooooo One day at a time :)
2 full days!! I think I'm going to take him out this weekend to the zoo or something. That really is an accomplishment :)
Everything else is okay, but might I say again 2 FULL DAYS :)
and in case you didn't grab that from the title
2 full days :)
Huge, huge steps. I'm extremely proud!
I don't want to jinx myself, but YAY!!! :)
His dad has been sending him messages every morning to motivate him and it really is helping him.
Sooooooooo One day at a time :)
2 full days!! I think I'm going to take him out this weekend to the zoo or something. That really is an accomplishment :)
Everything else is okay, but might I say again 2 FULL DAYS :)
and in case you didn't grab that from the title
2 full days :)
Huge, huge steps. I'm extremely proud!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Wednesday
Just an update to say we are all still alive.
I'm still coughing. Had about 20 panic attacks yesterday.
Had a rough evening.
Nothing good at all to report really. Just rewind, replay of life.
So you don't have to look back in archives, I'll make a check list for you.....
Are we sick---- Check
House always a mess----Check
Always cleaning----Check
Kyle and I arguing----Check
Stll bored and lonely-----Check
Dogs still a geek----Check
Iron low----Check
Someone always mad at me for things I say---Check Check
Truth hurts-----Check
That's about it, I think. I can't think of anymore right now. My mind is clouded from all the crying I have done in the past 24 hrs.
Kinda get scared to write anything anymore. I piss people off alot by the things I write. But, the funny thing is, I only skirt around what's really going on. It goes alot deeper than what I write. This is my blog and my place to vent. You have a choice, to read or not to read. If what I write bothers you.........Then choose not to read. Getting mad at me, solves nothing when you only know the half of what is really going on. So be mad all you want.....You only know what you are told. There are 2 sides to every story. One is not sugar coated.
Have a happy Wednesday. I am going to go take a shower and go back to bed. At least in my dreams life is good :)
I'm still coughing. Had about 20 panic attacks yesterday.
Had a rough evening.
Nothing good at all to report really. Just rewind, replay of life.
So you don't have to look back in archives, I'll make a check list for you.....
Are we sick---- Check
House always a mess----Check
Always cleaning----Check
Kyle and I arguing----Check
Stll bored and lonely-----Check
Dogs still a geek----Check
Iron low----Check
Someone always mad at me for things I say---Check Check
Truth hurts-----Check
That's about it, I think. I can't think of anymore right now. My mind is clouded from all the crying I have done in the past 24 hrs.
Kinda get scared to write anything anymore. I piss people off alot by the things I write. But, the funny thing is, I only skirt around what's really going on. It goes alot deeper than what I write. This is my blog and my place to vent. You have a choice, to read or not to read. If what I write bothers you.........Then choose not to read. Getting mad at me, solves nothing when you only know the half of what is really going on. So be mad all you want.....You only know what you are told. There are 2 sides to every story. One is not sugar coated.
Have a happy Wednesday. I am going to go take a shower and go back to bed. At least in my dreams life is good :)
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Still coughing and it's saturday again.
I thought for sure a couple days ago my cough was gone, but nope. It's one of those if it starts, it turns into like this spasm thing and it's hard to stop. Savannah was really sick last week. She had to get antibiotic. Then she started throwing up. Now all day she has been crying the whole entire day saying she feels dizzy and wiggly. I seriously can not take another illness. I hope this is just something in passing and not a virus. Juans doing better at school. Up to a full 6 hrs out of 7.
Anthony is doing alright. Not really much to report other than we all hate sickness.
Savannah has never been around kids ever in large groups. So I knew she would get sick. I didnt' realize how much though.
Have a happy weekend.
Anthony is doing alright. Not really much to report other than we all hate sickness.
Savannah has never been around kids ever in large groups. So I knew she would get sick. I didnt' realize how much though.
Have a happy weekend.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Sick n Grumpy
The whole house except Anthony is sick and grumpy. Savannah woke up this morning and didn't look right. I took her temp 102.3. Called the Dr. She is now on antibiotics. Kyle is sick. Coughing, clammy, stuffed up nose. I am still coughing bad. Juan is coughing very bad. We are all miserable and all grumpy. Sleepy too. It's been a bad couple weeks. Coughing is the absolute worst. I hope Savannahs fever goes away soon. She has laid around all day and it's just not the same. We all kinda rotate from tub to lay down or what have you.
Nothing else much going on. Stay away if I were you.
Happy Saturday
Nothing else much going on. Stay away if I were you.
Happy Saturday
Friday, September 14, 2007
Cough, Cough, Cough, Cry, about the way my Friday has gone
Juan and I were up talking last night about school. I told him I wanted him to try to go in early and stay as long as he could. He told me he wanted to try and stay the whole day and he would call me.
So we get up. I say "How are you doing?" Etc and he still wants to stay a full day etc.
UGHHHHHHHHHH This is where it gets bad. I ask Kyle if he will take him to school for me. UGH, he starts stressing. We are out of breakfast, he has to go to store. Is mad over that and complain, complain. I told him just to forget going, no big deal etc. It's too early at this point and I am too tired for any bitching or complaining.
So he leaves and goes to Kroger. Juan is dressed and ready, but has not eaten. So Kyle gets back and has a hissy fit cause Juan wants to eat breakfast. HELLO??????????? You knew he didn't have any breakfast. So he buys Savannah something to take for lunch, but didn't buy anything for Juan, so now we have another issue. I go downstairs and I hear Kyle make the comment to Juan that he needs to hurry and eat his cereal. So then I get involved about rushing him and blah blah blah and we escalate to arguing. Imagine that. So Juan just lays his bowl of cereal uneaten on the counter so Kyle could just get to work.
Savannah at this point is screaming and crying. Good God am I going to have to go through the rest of my life with no help. I take and pick Juan up every day. I just wanted a break this morning. I'm coughing so bad I hurt. I cough non stop. In hind sight, I should not have asked Kyle. I should've just done it myself. I could see the taxed look on Juans face when he came back in the door for something.
Kyle called me and UGH I told him, they told us at the hospital, YOU WERE THERE......to make his mornings as easy as possible. Why do you have to freaking yell and complain at him??????? I don't understand. This week has been hard already and he was ready to stay a full day.
To save an argument I told Juan I would pick him up at lunch to make sure he had something to eat and we will work more next week on getting him to stay full days.
So then Kyle and I argue some more on phone over how he can't miss any work and that he got in trouble for taking a few hours off when Juan was in hospital. OH BOO FREAKING HOO. It's not like we were out running around town.
I am officially done with asking anyone for help of any type. My kids, My issues.
I just sat in the driveway and cried for about 20 minutes. At least that curtailed the coughing for a bit. My chest hurts, my arms hurt, my jaws feel like they are locked up. I am so sore and so tired. Guess I'll go take a bath and clean then go pick up Juan.
Hope everyone else has a Happy Friday.
Good grief.
So we get up. I say "How are you doing?" Etc and he still wants to stay a full day etc.
UGHHHHHHHHHH This is where it gets bad. I ask Kyle if he will take him to school for me. UGH, he starts stressing. We are out of breakfast, he has to go to store. Is mad over that and complain, complain. I told him just to forget going, no big deal etc. It's too early at this point and I am too tired for any bitching or complaining.
So he leaves and goes to Kroger. Juan is dressed and ready, but has not eaten. So Kyle gets back and has a hissy fit cause Juan wants to eat breakfast. HELLO??????????? You knew he didn't have any breakfast. So he buys Savannah something to take for lunch, but didn't buy anything for Juan, so now we have another issue. I go downstairs and I hear Kyle make the comment to Juan that he needs to hurry and eat his cereal. So then I get involved about rushing him and blah blah blah and we escalate to arguing. Imagine that. So Juan just lays his bowl of cereal uneaten on the counter so Kyle could just get to work.
Savannah at this point is screaming and crying. Good God am I going to have to go through the rest of my life with no help. I take and pick Juan up every day. I just wanted a break this morning. I'm coughing so bad I hurt. I cough non stop. In hind sight, I should not have asked Kyle. I should've just done it myself. I could see the taxed look on Juans face when he came back in the door for something.
Kyle called me and UGH I told him, they told us at the hospital, YOU WERE THERE......to make his mornings as easy as possible. Why do you have to freaking yell and complain at him??????? I don't understand. This week has been hard already and he was ready to stay a full day.
To save an argument I told Juan I would pick him up at lunch to make sure he had something to eat and we will work more next week on getting him to stay full days.
So then Kyle and I argue some more on phone over how he can't miss any work and that he got in trouble for taking a few hours off when Juan was in hospital. OH BOO FREAKING HOO. It's not like we were out running around town.
I am officially done with asking anyone for help of any type. My kids, My issues.
I just sat in the driveway and cried for about 20 minutes. At least that curtailed the coughing for a bit. My chest hurts, my arms hurt, my jaws feel like they are locked up. I am so sore and so tired. Guess I'll go take a bath and clean then go pick up Juan.
Hope everyone else has a Happy Friday.
Good grief.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Happy Tuesday..... I think LOL
OMG My rear end hurts soooooo bad, well towards my hip that part. I was scrubbing the kitchen floor on my hands and my knees and I was going really fast and backed right into the corner of the wall. Owooooooooooo, it bruised instantly. Good grief!!
Um..... School update for Juan. Yesterday was a VERY rough day. He just would not go in school, said he felt very funny etc. We get home, he has a fever and a cold. Stopped up nose, coughing and said he's very dizzy. So was it the cold? Was it the anxiety? Today, he is still very sick. Keeps laying in the tub. Normally, had he gone to school, I would have no question about letting him stay home. But, UGH HE needs to go to school. I am beside myself.
If I end up in jail from truancy, please bring me gluten free bread and water. His school is of no help. They are supposed to have a counselor to come in and work with him weekly, they do not. It's like parents are automatically supposed to know the steps to take for these things.
Savannah is home today sick. She has a very bad cough, fever, runny nose.
If you wanna get sick, come lick our doorknobs!! :P
Okay, so Juans dog is on my LAST Freaking nerve. I won't even call her by her name because I am so mad at her.
We have vertical blinds hanging in the living room and she has chewed them over and over. We keep buying the replacement blinds and fix them no problem. So yesterday I am leaving, open the blinds all the way so she can't get to them. I get home and OMG she ripped them ALL completely off the wall. The brackets and everything. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Kyle got them hung back up, but OMG what's with the blind eating?
That's about all going on here. If I hear you knocking at the door, I'll assume you want germs.
I Predict Lindsays baby is coming tomorrow, so I gotta stay far away from her with my germs.
Happy Tuesday.
Be well.
Um..... School update for Juan. Yesterday was a VERY rough day. He just would not go in school, said he felt very funny etc. We get home, he has a fever and a cold. Stopped up nose, coughing and said he's very dizzy. So was it the cold? Was it the anxiety? Today, he is still very sick. Keeps laying in the tub. Normally, had he gone to school, I would have no question about letting him stay home. But, UGH HE needs to go to school. I am beside myself.
If I end up in jail from truancy, please bring me gluten free bread and water. His school is of no help. They are supposed to have a counselor to come in and work with him weekly, they do not. It's like parents are automatically supposed to know the steps to take for these things.
Savannah is home today sick. She has a very bad cough, fever, runny nose.
If you wanna get sick, come lick our doorknobs!! :P
Okay, so Juans dog is on my LAST Freaking nerve. I won't even call her by her name because I am so mad at her.
We have vertical blinds hanging in the living room and she has chewed them over and over. We keep buying the replacement blinds and fix them no problem. So yesterday I am leaving, open the blinds all the way so she can't get to them. I get home and OMG she ripped them ALL completely off the wall. The brackets and everything. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Kyle got them hung back up, but OMG what's with the blind eating?
That's about all going on here. If I hear you knocking at the door, I'll assume you want germs.
I Predict Lindsays baby is coming tomorrow, so I gotta stay far away from her with my germs.
Happy Tuesday.
Be well.
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Quick, what day is it? Um Thursday?
Good grief, how pathetic is it that I can't remember what day it is. They say that's a sign of fun. Who's they anyway? I think they lie!!
Hmmmm lets see. Good things, Juan almost spent the whole day at school today and rode the bus home. Says his chest doesn't hurt anymore. No more shaking and dizziness. So that is awesome!!
He got a package from his dad today and was happy as a lark. His dad sent him and Anthony some Tshirts and hats and stuff. He immediatley ran upstairs put everything on and had to find some stuff to put in his wallet. It's almost his birthday, he can soon fill it up with some dough!
Savannahs doing really well in school. Anthonys doing really well in school. He has a girlfriend and I have to keep a complete and total short leash on him. Hard to do.
I'm doing okay, still very lonely and stressed, but at least things are looking up.
I just wish I could get out of this funk I am in, but it's hard to do.
Usually people associate me with talking all the time, but anymore I barely say anything. I just become more closed off. That's not really a good thing. Not sure how to deal with that.
Lately I wake up in the middle of the night crying and crying from the lonelies. I will have to check back in my blog and see the last time it happened. Maybe it's a pattern. It doesn't happen all the time, but happens on occassion. I can't explain it, I wake up out of a dead sleep and feel this lonliness and ache I can't describe and I just cry. Times like that one needs a huge hug. Frustrating.
Um........ what else is happening. My dogs are stupid. Juans stupid dog recently ate the front blinds. She couldn't see out of them so she chewed her a hole. Ate 6 of them. GRRRRRRRRR Kyle went and bought a package of replacement ones and fixed it. Of course Juan laughed his butt off. Stupid dog.
2 boy stories and a Savannah story then I'm outta here............
First Anthony...... I told alot of you this who came to hospital. But when we were leaving, we had to be let down the stairs by an escort. So we were walking and Anthony says "Oh cool they have a small movie theater here" I'm thinking,,,,,Huh? So then I ask him why he says that and he points to a sign below that says "Admissions only" I was trying so hard not to laugh. We got to the bottom of the stairs and the escort is trying not to laugh and he opened up the door and held it for us and says "Enjoy the show" was a classic!
Juan, Juan
So I'm driving him to school yesterday......We see a very small toyota with 2 HUGE HUGE Men in it. Juan looks over and says "Dude, did you see that" I was like Juan, you know better than to make fun of people. He says "No mom, you have to check them out. If I get like that shoot me" So I glance over. The men are every bit of 400 or more pounds and at least 6 foot tall. Imagine them in a very, very small toyota. I kept my laughter in cause it was kinda funny, but wanted to set a good example. The car is going at a snail pace and I go around them and Juan then is looking in his mirror, laughing hysterically "Mom really you gotta freaking check that out" So I fix my mirror to where I can see and the wheels on the car are not only wobbling the rim is almost touching the ground. At that point, I lost it and laughed and feel horribly ashamed. Going to say the rosary cause I feel awful for laughing, but it was so funny. Funnier than the window unit air conditioner hanging out of a window of a car we saw.
Savannah Banana
Juans dog likes to um...... How do you say this nicely. Hump for lack of a better word. She is a female and since we had her fixed, she always is um..... humping.
Well........She took Anthonys turkey sandwich and then started humping him. So Kyle and Juan start saying "thank you for the turkey, thank you for the turkey" and I am laughing hysterically at this point. So now everytime she does it, we always say "thank you for the turkey, thank you for the turkey" But Alas it's a better name than mentioned above. So we crawl in bed, Savannah is totally exhausted. Anthony opens the door and Claire runs down and hops in bed and starts licking Savannah, she looks up sleepily and says "Claire, please don't thank me for anything tonight" Total classic line!! My kids are funny.
I am blessed.
Sorry I'm not updating every day. Been busy.
I made up for it today.
Happy Um Thursday is it?
Send rain and cool weather. It's hot!
Hmmmm lets see. Good things, Juan almost spent the whole day at school today and rode the bus home. Says his chest doesn't hurt anymore. No more shaking and dizziness. So that is awesome!!
He got a package from his dad today and was happy as a lark. His dad sent him and Anthony some Tshirts and hats and stuff. He immediatley ran upstairs put everything on and had to find some stuff to put in his wallet. It's almost his birthday, he can soon fill it up with some dough!
Savannahs doing really well in school. Anthonys doing really well in school. He has a girlfriend and I have to keep a complete and total short leash on him. Hard to do.
I'm doing okay, still very lonely and stressed, but at least things are looking up.
I just wish I could get out of this funk I am in, but it's hard to do.
Usually people associate me with talking all the time, but anymore I barely say anything. I just become more closed off. That's not really a good thing. Not sure how to deal with that.
Lately I wake up in the middle of the night crying and crying from the lonelies. I will have to check back in my blog and see the last time it happened. Maybe it's a pattern. It doesn't happen all the time, but happens on occassion. I can't explain it, I wake up out of a dead sleep and feel this lonliness and ache I can't describe and I just cry. Times like that one needs a huge hug. Frustrating.
Um........ what else is happening. My dogs are stupid. Juans stupid dog recently ate the front blinds. She couldn't see out of them so she chewed her a hole. Ate 6 of them. GRRRRRRRRR Kyle went and bought a package of replacement ones and fixed it. Of course Juan laughed his butt off. Stupid dog.
2 boy stories and a Savannah story then I'm outta here............
First Anthony...... I told alot of you this who came to hospital. But when we were leaving, we had to be let down the stairs by an escort. So we were walking and Anthony says "Oh cool they have a small movie theater here" I'm thinking,,,,,Huh? So then I ask him why he says that and he points to a sign below that says "Admissions only" I was trying so hard not to laugh. We got to the bottom of the stairs and the escort is trying not to laugh and he opened up the door and held it for us and says "Enjoy the show" was a classic!
Juan, Juan
So I'm driving him to school yesterday......We see a very small toyota with 2 HUGE HUGE Men in it. Juan looks over and says "Dude, did you see that" I was like Juan, you know better than to make fun of people. He says "No mom, you have to check them out. If I get like that shoot me" So I glance over. The men are every bit of 400 or more pounds and at least 6 foot tall. Imagine them in a very, very small toyota. I kept my laughter in cause it was kinda funny, but wanted to set a good example. The car is going at a snail pace and I go around them and Juan then is looking in his mirror, laughing hysterically "Mom really you gotta freaking check that out" So I fix my mirror to where I can see and the wheels on the car are not only wobbling the rim is almost touching the ground. At that point, I lost it and laughed and feel horribly ashamed. Going to say the rosary cause I feel awful for laughing, but it was so funny. Funnier than the window unit air conditioner hanging out of a window of a car we saw.
Savannah Banana
Juans dog likes to um...... How do you say this nicely. Hump for lack of a better word. She is a female and since we had her fixed, she always is um..... humping.
Well........She took Anthonys turkey sandwich and then started humping him. So Kyle and Juan start saying "thank you for the turkey, thank you for the turkey" and I am laughing hysterically at this point. So now everytime she does it, we always say "thank you for the turkey, thank you for the turkey" But Alas it's a better name than mentioned above. So we crawl in bed, Savannah is totally exhausted. Anthony opens the door and Claire runs down and hops in bed and starts licking Savannah, she looks up sleepily and says "Claire, please don't thank me for anything tonight" Total classic line!! My kids are funny.
I am blessed.
Sorry I'm not updating every day. Been busy.
I made up for it today.
Happy Um Thursday is it?
Send rain and cool weather. It's hot!
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
Hi everyone!!
Haven't updated in a few days. Not much really to report. Just trying half days with Juan at school. It's really frustrating for me because his school isn' that close and by the time I get home, I have to turn around and go get him. I was really looking forward to going back to work, but now that's on hold AGAIN.
I go through bouts of anger, sadness or whatever. I got some of Juans cardiology reports back and they said with the Tachardia (spelling is awful) he may have Mitral Valve Prolapse, which causes his heart to feel funny, triggering the anxiety attacks. They are supposed to call me back. I'm exhausted. We all had some virus, each had it a day apart from each other, cept Kyle and Anthony because they are rarely in contact with the rest of us.
Kyle took them down to the river with his family on Saturday. I was thinking YAY I get to spend the day alone, but felt sick and weak the whole day. Carol I think mom mentioned you had the same thing. :( We must've all passed it at the hospital.
Sunday we went swimming at moms and had a cookout. I was still worn out.
Yesterday I did nothing the whole day. Just sat. Bored and tired.
Today, just got Savannah ready for school, then got to drive Juan to school. Come home with time to mop a floor, turn around and go pick him up then the rest get home. So as far as enjoying Savannah being in school, I don't see it happening anytime soon. That sounds so selfish when you read it, but I have dealt with this school issue for years and years and I'm tired.
I talked to Juans dad, he talked to his dad also.
He told Juan he would email him and call him. Juan emailed him Friday night and has checked his box over and over looking for a reply. I told him that the military was off til today. So I hope and I pray that he writes him back. His face lit up like I haven't seen in years. To see him that happy was awesome.
Other than that nothing going on.................
Happy Whatever day it is. Tuesday???
I go through bouts of anger, sadness or whatever. I got some of Juans cardiology reports back and they said with the Tachardia (spelling is awful) he may have Mitral Valve Prolapse, which causes his heart to feel funny, triggering the anxiety attacks. They are supposed to call me back. I'm exhausted. We all had some virus, each had it a day apart from each other, cept Kyle and Anthony because they are rarely in contact with the rest of us.
Kyle took them down to the river with his family on Saturday. I was thinking YAY I get to spend the day alone, but felt sick and weak the whole day. Carol I think mom mentioned you had the same thing. :( We must've all passed it at the hospital.
Sunday we went swimming at moms and had a cookout. I was still worn out.
Yesterday I did nothing the whole day. Just sat. Bored and tired.
Today, just got Savannah ready for school, then got to drive Juan to school. Come home with time to mop a floor, turn around and go pick him up then the rest get home. So as far as enjoying Savannah being in school, I don't see it happening anytime soon. That sounds so selfish when you read it, but I have dealt with this school issue for years and years and I'm tired.
I talked to Juans dad, he talked to his dad also.
He told Juan he would email him and call him. Juan emailed him Friday night and has checked his box over and over looking for a reply. I told him that the military was off til today. So I hope and I pray that he writes him back. His face lit up like I haven't seen in years. To see him that happy was awesome.
Other than that nothing going on.................
Happy Whatever day it is. Tuesday???
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