Sunday, September 30, 2007

It's Sunday

So was Savannah sick this weekend????? YES! She threw up last night and was very sick to her stomach :(
I am not liking the school thing. Hopefully with the 4 day weekend soon, she has time to completely get well!
We are trying to coax Anthony to get a job. He said he doesn't want to spend his free time working. Had a 30 minute argument about how he has to go to school and that is job enough and it will waste his childhood getting a job.
I told him that if he wants to have his girlfriend a nice Christmas present, he really better start thinking seriously about a job. I tried to get him to apply for the zoos Halloween Party, tried for a snack bar attendant at the pool. Fun jobs. He wants no part of it. Dunno what other option to explore there. I think a job will really help him. Juan will have no problem getting a job, he's out mowing yards and all sorts of stuff for money.
Who knows! Boys.
Claire has been very sick all weekend.
Friday I was sitting on the couch, got up and got the worst dizzy spell I have ever in my life had. I was so ill, my arms hurt, my legs were weak. I laid in the basement and cried because I was so scared. Kyle got Savannah off the bus and took her to dance class. Yesterday as the 24 hr mark hit, it magically disappeared. Prayers lots of prayers and I think it was the virus Savannah had last week when she said she felt wiggly.
What do kindergarteners do in their class to get all these germs. Do they chew on crayons? Do they put their hands in their mouths? I knew she would be sick, I counted on it. But good grief. I didn't know every single week she would be bringing home everything.
Kinda scary.
Today I am cleaning and thats about it.

Happy Sunday

Friday, September 28, 2007

2 Full days

Juan has gotten up and ridden the bus to school and spent FULL DAYS! :)
I don't want to jinx myself, but YAY!!! :)
His dad has been sending him messages every morning to motivate him and it really is helping him.
Sooooooooo One day at a time :)
2 full days!! I think I'm going to take him out this weekend to the zoo or something. That really is an accomplishment :)

Everything else is okay, but might I say again 2 FULL DAYS :)

and in case you didn't grab that from the title

2 full days :)

Huge, huge steps. I'm extremely proud!

Wednesday, September 26, 2007


Just an update to say we are all still alive.
I'm still coughing. Had about 20 panic attacks yesterday.
Had a rough evening.
Nothing good at all to report really. Just rewind, replay of life.
So you don't have to look back in archives, I'll make a check list for you.....

Are we sick---- Check
House always a mess----Check
Always cleaning----Check
Kyle and I arguing----Check
Stll bored and lonely-----Check
Dogs still a geek----Check
Iron low----Check
Someone always mad at me for things I say---Check Check
Truth hurts-----Check

That's about it, I think. I can't think of anymore right now. My mind is clouded from all the crying I have done in the past 24 hrs.

Kinda get scared to write anything anymore. I piss people off alot by the things I write. But, the funny thing is, I only skirt around what's really going on. It goes alot deeper than what I write. This is my blog and my place to vent. You have a choice, to read or not to read. If what I write bothers you.........Then choose not to read. Getting mad at me, solves nothing when you only know the half of what is really going on. So be mad all you want.....You only know what you are told. There are 2 sides to every story. One is not sugar coated.

Have a happy Wednesday. I am going to go take a shower and go back to bed. At least in my dreams life is good :)

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Still coughing and it's saturday again.

I thought for sure a couple days ago my cough was gone, but nope. It's one of those if it starts, it turns into like this spasm thing and it's hard to stop. Savannah was really sick last week. She had to get antibiotic. Then she started throwing up. Now all day she has been crying the whole entire day saying she feels dizzy and wiggly. I seriously can not take another illness. I hope this is just something in passing and not a virus. Juans doing better at school. Up to a full 6 hrs out of 7.
Anthony is doing alright. Not really much to report other than we all hate sickness.
Savannah has never been around kids ever in large groups. So I knew she would get sick. I didnt' realize how much though.
Have a happy weekend.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Sick n Grumpy

The whole house except Anthony is sick and grumpy. Savannah woke up this morning and didn't look right. I took her temp 102.3. Called the Dr. She is now on antibiotics. Kyle is sick. Coughing, clammy, stuffed up nose. I am still coughing bad. Juan is coughing very bad. We are all miserable and all grumpy. Sleepy too. It's been a bad couple weeks. Coughing is the absolute worst. I hope Savannahs fever goes away soon. She has laid around all day and it's just not the same. We all kinda rotate from tub to lay down or what have you.
Nothing else much going on. Stay away if I were you.
Happy Saturday

Friday, September 14, 2007

Cough, Cough, Cough, Cry, about the way my Friday has gone

Juan and I were up talking last night about school. I told him I wanted him to try to go in early and stay as long as he could. He told me he wanted to try and stay the whole day and he would call me.
So we get up. I say "How are you doing?" Etc and he still wants to stay a full day etc.
UGHHHHHHHHHH This is where it gets bad. I ask Kyle if he will take him to school for me. UGH, he starts stressing. We are out of breakfast, he has to go to store. Is mad over that and complain, complain. I told him just to forget going, no big deal etc. It's too early at this point and I am too tired for any bitching or complaining.
So he leaves and goes to Kroger. Juan is dressed and ready, but has not eaten. So Kyle gets back and has a hissy fit cause Juan wants to eat breakfast. HELLO??????????? You knew he didn't have any breakfast. So he buys Savannah something to take for lunch, but didn't buy anything for Juan, so now we have another issue. I go downstairs and I hear Kyle make the comment to Juan that he needs to hurry and eat his cereal. So then I get involved about rushing him and blah blah blah and we escalate to arguing. Imagine that. So Juan just lays his bowl of cereal uneaten on the counter so Kyle could just get to work.
Savannah at this point is screaming and crying. Good God am I going to have to go through the rest of my life with no help. I take and pick Juan up every day. I just wanted a break this morning. I'm coughing so bad I hurt. I cough non stop. In hind sight, I should not have asked Kyle. I should've just done it myself. I could see the taxed look on Juans face when he came back in the door for something.
Kyle called me and UGH I told him, they told us at the hospital, YOU WERE make his mornings as easy as possible. Why do you have to freaking yell and complain at him??????? I don't understand. This week has been hard already and he was ready to stay a full day.
To save an argument I told Juan I would pick him up at lunch to make sure he had something to eat and we will work more next week on getting him to stay full days.
So then Kyle and I argue some more on phone over how he can't miss any work and that he got in trouble for taking a few hours off when Juan was in hospital. OH BOO FREAKING HOO. It's not like we were out running around town.
I am officially done with asking anyone for help of any type. My kids, My issues.
I just sat in the driveway and cried for about 20 minutes. At least that curtailed the coughing for a bit. My chest hurts, my arms hurt, my jaws feel like they are locked up. I am so sore and so tired. Guess I'll go take a bath and clean then go pick up Juan.
Hope everyone else has a Happy Friday.
Good grief.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Happy Tuesday..... I think LOL

OMG My rear end hurts soooooo bad, well towards my hip that part. I was scrubbing the kitchen floor on my hands and my knees and I was going really fast and backed right into the corner of the wall. Owooooooooooo, it bruised instantly. Good grief!!
Um..... School update for Juan. Yesterday was a VERY rough day. He just would not go in school, said he felt very funny etc. We get home, he has a fever and a cold. Stopped up nose, coughing and said he's very dizzy. So was it the cold? Was it the anxiety? Today, he is still very sick. Keeps laying in the tub. Normally, had he gone to school, I would have no question about letting him stay home. But, UGH HE needs to go to school. I am beside myself.
If I end up in jail from truancy, please bring me gluten free bread and water. His school is of no help. They are supposed to have a counselor to come in and work with him weekly, they do not. It's like parents are automatically supposed to know the steps to take for these things.
Savannah is home today sick. She has a very bad cough, fever, runny nose.
If you wanna get sick, come lick our doorknobs!! :P
Okay, so Juans dog is on my LAST Freaking nerve. I won't even call her by her name because I am so mad at her.
We have vertical blinds hanging in the living room and she has chewed them over and over. We keep buying the replacement blinds and fix them no problem. So yesterday I am leaving, open the blinds all the way so she can't get to them. I get home and OMG she ripped them ALL completely off the wall. The brackets and everything. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Kyle got them hung back up, but OMG what's with the blind eating?
That's about all going on here. If I hear you knocking at the door, I'll assume you want germs.
I Predict Lindsays baby is coming tomorrow, so I gotta stay far away from her with my germs.
Happy Tuesday.
Be well.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

Quick, what day is it? Um Thursday?

Good grief, how pathetic is it that I can't remember what day it is. They say that's a sign of fun. Who's they anyway? I think they lie!!
Hmmmm lets see. Good things, Juan almost spent the whole day at school today and rode the bus home. Says his chest doesn't hurt anymore. No more shaking and dizziness. So that is awesome!!
He got a package from his dad today and was happy as a lark. His dad sent him and Anthony some Tshirts and hats and stuff. He immediatley ran upstairs put everything on and had to find some stuff to put in his wallet. It's almost his birthday, he can soon fill it up with some dough!
Savannahs doing really well in school. Anthonys doing really well in school. He has a girlfriend and I have to keep a complete and total short leash on him. Hard to do.
I'm doing okay, still very lonely and stressed, but at least things are looking up.
I just wish I could get out of this funk I am in, but it's hard to do.
Usually people associate me with talking all the time, but anymore I barely say anything. I just become more closed off. That's not really a good thing. Not sure how to deal with that.
Lately I wake up in the middle of the night crying and crying from the lonelies. I will have to check back in my blog and see the last time it happened. Maybe it's a pattern. It doesn't happen all the time, but happens on occassion. I can't explain it, I wake up out of a dead sleep and feel this lonliness and ache I can't describe and I just cry. Times like that one needs a huge hug. Frustrating.
Um........ what else is happening. My dogs are stupid. Juans stupid dog recently ate the front blinds. She couldn't see out of them so she chewed her a hole. Ate 6 of them. GRRRRRRRRR Kyle went and bought a package of replacement ones and fixed it. Of course Juan laughed his butt off. Stupid dog.
2 boy stories and a Savannah story then I'm outta here............
First Anthony...... I told alot of you this who came to hospital. But when we were leaving, we had to be let down the stairs by an escort. So we were walking and Anthony says "Oh cool they have a small movie theater here" I'm thinking,,,,,Huh? So then I ask him why he says that and he points to a sign below that says "Admissions only" I was trying so hard not to laugh. We got to the bottom of the stairs and the escort is trying not to laugh and he opened up the door and held it for us and says "Enjoy the show" was a classic!
Juan, Juan
So I'm driving him to school yesterday......We see a very small toyota with 2 HUGE HUGE Men in it. Juan looks over and says "Dude, did you see that" I was like Juan, you know better than to make fun of people. He says "No mom, you have to check them out. If I get like that shoot me" So I glance over. The men are every bit of 400 or more pounds and at least 6 foot tall. Imagine them in a very, very small toyota. I kept my laughter in cause it was kinda funny, but wanted to set a good example. The car is going at a snail pace and I go around them and Juan then is looking in his mirror, laughing hysterically "Mom really you gotta freaking check that out" So I fix my mirror to where I can see and the wheels on the car are not only wobbling the rim is almost touching the ground. At that point, I lost it and laughed and feel horribly ashamed. Going to say the rosary cause I feel awful for laughing, but it was so funny. Funnier than the window unit air conditioner hanging out of a window of a car we saw.
Savannah Banana
Juans dog likes to um...... How do you say this nicely. Hump for lack of a better word. She is a female and since we had her fixed, she always is um..... humping.
Well........She took Anthonys turkey sandwich and then started humping him. So Kyle and Juan start saying "thank you for the turkey, thank you for the turkey" and I am laughing hysterically at this point. So now everytime she does it, we always say "thank you for the turkey, thank you for the turkey" But Alas it's a better name than mentioned above. So we crawl in bed, Savannah is totally exhausted. Anthony opens the door and Claire runs down and hops in bed and starts licking Savannah, she looks up sleepily and says "Claire, please don't thank me for anything tonight" Total classic line!! My kids are funny.
I am blessed.
Sorry I'm not updating every day. Been busy.
I made up for it today.
Happy Um Thursday is it?
Send rain and cool weather. It's hot!

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Hi everyone!!

Haven't updated in a few days. Not much really to report. Just trying half days with Juan at school. It's really frustrating for me because his school isn' that close and by the time I get home, I have to turn around and go get him. I was really looking forward to going back to work, but now that's on hold AGAIN.
I go through bouts of anger, sadness or whatever. I got some of Juans cardiology reports back and they said with the Tachardia (spelling is awful) he may have Mitral Valve Prolapse, which causes his heart to feel funny, triggering the anxiety attacks. They are supposed to call me back. I'm exhausted. We all had some virus, each had it a day apart from each other, cept Kyle and Anthony because they are rarely in contact with the rest of us.
Kyle took them down to the river with his family on Saturday. I was thinking YAY I get to spend the day alone, but felt sick and weak the whole day. Carol I think mom mentioned you had the same thing. :( We must've all passed it at the hospital.
Sunday we went swimming at moms and had a cookout. I was still worn out.
Yesterday I did nothing the whole day. Just sat. Bored and tired.
Today, just got Savannah ready for school, then got to drive Juan to school. Come home with time to mop a floor, turn around and go pick him up then the rest get home. So as far as enjoying Savannah being in school, I don't see it happening anytime soon. That sounds so selfish when you read it, but I have dealt with this school issue for years and years and I'm tired.
I talked to Juans dad, he talked to his dad also.
He told Juan he would email him and call him. Juan emailed him Friday night and has checked his box over and over looking for a reply. I told him that the military was off til today. So I hope and I pray that he writes him back. His face lit up like I haven't seen in years. To see him that happy was awesome.
Other than that nothing going on.................
Happy Whatever day it is. Tuesday???