Both my boys are having trouble. Juan is having some fits again. Pretty bad ones here lately. He's back in therapy. Anthony is on a waiting list.
They both ask me why certain people don't want to see them. For Juan it's his dad, he wants to know why he writes them letters and he never calls or wants to see him. I don't know the answer to this, but I take alot of the wrath for it. Alot of his problems stem from rejection. It's hard to know your dad doesn't want you and you don't have a clue why.
Anthony, his dads side of the family, basically fell off the face of the earth. He asks why so and so doesn't see him, or how come so and so doesnt come over. They think I have all these answers. As time goes on, I just get angrier and angrier at the people who hurt my kids. They did nothing, NOTHING to deserve not being worthy of someones time.
The whole lot of them will have excuses or say they were too busy or this and that. Thats fine. When anthonys dad died everyone wanted to see him. Maybe out of guilt for the way they had done his dad when he was alive. Over the years, they disappeared. They pop up everyonce in awhile at a store and a select few call, well wait, they don't even call anymore. When they get to feeling guilty, usually around August when brett died. They'll call him. That will satisfy their guilt for another year or so. Maybe rush in at christmas to give them some gifts, but then rush out the door to go to others families who are more important.
That's okay, Ill be there to pick up the pieces. I've been picking up the pieces for damn near 15 years. But Im about done with the people doing it. One thing I know about me, when I am done, I am done. I'm almost there.
These people don't get the wrath of it. I do. With Juan theres alot of wrath, alot of hate and alot of anger. Anthony theres sadness, Anger and just sad.
Have a great Saturday all.
2 comments:
I am sorry how your boys feel. I know that is how Emily too felt. She had no one. I believe that is why she was bad, cause she blamed me for her dad not coming around. I never said any thing bad about him and still don't to her. But, if she talks to her dad now, he calls me ever freakin name in the book and more. I think it is so unfair for us all.
Keep being positive!
Love, Angel
I don't understand why people want to take out everything on kids!!! Just hang in there. They will know as they grow to adults who they can trust and count on and who they can't. They really need to let go of the anger though. By holding on to it they are letting the people who hurt them control their lifes forever. You don't have any control over what people do to you, but you can control how you handle it!! I hope they can learn not to let them have that power over them.
Post a Comment