today was just Long, LONGGGGGGGGGG! Juan had a dr appt for his therapist at 10:30, we get there at 10:15, an hour passes, then 2 hours pass and then finally we go back. I was so frazzled and just not happy at all about a 2 hr wait time. Said she had another patient. Bad scheduling i suppose. Headache for me.
I got home and had to call his Insurance company so they can add the new therapist to their list. Well............ Now keep in mind he hasn't seen his dad is 10 years about. They tell me cause of the privacy laws, I can't add or change anything to his insurance. His dad has to do it all. I was like........HELLO his dad hasn't seen him, he just has to keep the insurance on him. Nope they say, they can't help me. Okay first of all I haven't a clue where the man is. Second of all, i take care of all the stuff. Evidentally not anymore. So thats headache number 2.
I just wanna go to bed. The therapist today told me,I can see it in your face how stressed you are. Think of it this way "if you had one week to live, is this how you'd spend your life" Well UH NO. I mean what am i supposed to do???????????? I get no sleep, i never see my husband, I constantly have to clean house or fool with kids, I don't have any resources to just pick up and take a break. So UGH. I do realize I need to take care of myself, but ummmmmmmmm thats hard to do. This morning I went to go brush my hair and i realized, i don't even look in the mirror anymore. I usually just use my compact and put my hair up in a pony tail. Thats purty bad. But who cares, who sees my hair anyway, ijust sit in this house with all these freaking kids all day. I think I'll start searching for a job that won't make me have anxiety attacks and something I like so I can get away from babysitting. I truly hate it.
Have a great tuesday its American Idol night tomorrow!
2 comments:
Hey Nanna, sorry about that insurance stuff and then with the added bonus of having to contact-you know who. My friend Lesa has the same prob. Psycho dad and can't get any info from the ins. company. She even had to pay for some stuff (some very expensive stuff) to keep him from knowing. Its crazy. For these sits there should be a way around with the ins. companies b/c it makes it hard for the kids and their caregivers which is usually the "ONE WHO PROVIDES THE CARE!!!!)
Hang in there. Hope your day goes better.
You know, I no longer take care of myself like I need to as well. I do the same thing..brush my hair and throw it in a pony..so much easier, and I suppose that it has just become a lifestyle that I have fallen into. Sometimes a change does us good...you know, if you get a job, all you have to do is worry about your OWN kiddos...much better! :) I wish you all the best, whatever you decide. You deserve the vey best in life..we all do! :)
You are loved, Dianna!
Love,
Sarah
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