Friday, January 28, 2011

Updating a bit more

I had to run to the bank to get some checks and stuff for Monday to take to payroll.

I'm so happy my heart feels fluttery like when you fall in love!!

The LAST real job I have had (outside of doing independant stuff) was at Nichol's Tae Kwon Do and Judo Academy on Richmond Hwy in Alexandria VA.... I remember it REALLY well.

Working in an actual place has been a huge source of anxiety for me, with my PTSD.

The last night I worked I came home late...Kids were asleep. I didn't check on them or anything. Woke Anthony up for school the next day and his whole face was black and blue.

I was in shock and asked him what happened. He said "Daddy kept hitting me with the phone cause I wouldn't go to sleep. I went to sleep mommy."

I didn't know what to do because the kids were never his outlet. Only me.

So......I went to Mr. Nichols (who to this day is still my friend) and told him I couldn't work anymore. A week later I moved back to KY.

Everytime I tried to work and would be at work I would start having anxiety worrying if the kids were okay, if someone was hurting them.

I have tried to work over the years and just couldn't.

I had to do things like clean houses and hair cuts here and there where I could either take the kids with me or leave if I needed to.

I have prayed about this over and over again. I asked God to help me find a job I would be good at and where I could make a difference.

I know I'm ready. I know.

Seeing that job open up on that board.......Grabbing that application without even a tiny bit of apprehension.

That job was made for me and I'm so excited words can't even describe.

God brought me to it and He will get me through it.

I'm so happy!

Thank God. <3

=)

YAY!! I got the job!!!!!

~Dianna

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