Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Frustrating day I spose'

Why Oh Why school is out so much is beyond me. My kids have been off since Friday, this coming after they were off a week from the hurricane. Normally, I don't mind. I love having them around. But, after the big altercation the other day, I haven't had a chance to unwind. Had they gone to school yesterday I would've spent the day crying and getting over what happened. I'm mentally drained. I need a few breathing seconds. Dishes, dogs, laundry... I woke up to a disaster this morning and I Just wanna sit down and relax and kids, kids, kids. Savannah has these neighborhood kids she plays with, so from the time she gets up its constant, non stop ... mom i wanna see alyssa and Leah. Not a break.... So today the anxiety attacks hit ... i have a 3 day window, panic stays away for 2 or 3 days after the stressful situation, then it unleashes upon me like no other. I have had panic attacks in waves all day... No place for a quiet spot. I'm tired. So I guess I gotta ride out the storm of anxiety, get up and finish cleaning, have the kids mess it all up again......... Keep the prayers coming.
I'm spent.

1 comment:

Carie said...

that seems like alot of lost school time...wow, what is the time off this time for? Ashley seldom ever gets time off, sumer for her is 1 month, its crazy...

I do hope you are able to find the time needed to let go, to figure it out...maybe just put the ipod on while you clean and let go that way...I do it all the time, even when Ash has friends here lol, put in my music, sing as loud as I can, clean, move...it helps so much, an outlet...

If you need anything, I am here, and if I lived anywhere near you I would so come kid nap you for a day of fun...you need it so bad, to laugh and laugh til you can't laugh any more, then you just laugh again...keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers