Friday, March 08, 2013

Not just a quote from a movie

“For if you suffer your people to be ill-educated, and their manners to be corrupted from their infancy, and then punish them for those crimes to which their first education disposed them, what else is to be concluded from this, but that you first make thieves and then punish them.”
― Thomas More, Utopia

I have been thinking about this quote for a few years. I didn't read it in Utopia, I heard it in a movie, "Ever after." It hits close to home with me, not because I am a theif, but because of insecurity.

People since birth have made me insecure, people find ways to do it now.....Then, I am punished for what they have made me to be.

It's kind of sad really, but true.

I keep waiting for God to change me and it never comes.

I don't like being insecure at all manipulation does that over time. You find yourself not talking, not emailing because no one listens to what your say or you are told it's not important.

As before I say it again, being hit was easier than words. Words can't leave my mind and I can't forget them as hard as I try.

Words since I was 9 still affect me, I wish I were someone else.

Someone important.

Trying to make myself believe I'm important to anyone, even God.

Just not happening.

I finally slept good. Had an amazing dream.....oh well.



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