Wednesday, May 22, 2013

This week stinks

Sigh. I have had a few really annoying illnesses this past couple of weeks and I'm sad, frustrated and angry.

Chronic illness isn't any fun and it's really hard to get people to understand what you are going through.

It's funny because this morning I am struggling with dizziness again and I am pouring over my behavior as to what I have done now for God to punish me.

It's not a punishment, things just are.

I think about the thug next door, who is a seedy, evil spawn......Why isn't he dizzy? Mean people around me, why aren't they dizzy?

It all boils down to the "Why Me's?"

I have to keep telling myself that I am not being punished. God knew what He was getting when He chose me. This will pass.

I don't know what I can do to make things better. An air filter?? I tried that before, but the filters were almost as much as the air filter. I take allergy meds.......Maybe I should take them in the morning and the night?

I just want to be healthy. Have a healthy head and respiratory system....No inhalers, no pills. Have a healthy stomach, anything I put in my mouth makes me sick.

My appointment at the ENT is at 2 to have the epley manuever done. It doesn't take long, but the fear it produces while someone is holding your head down.......I just don't want to do it. I have to.

Fear stinks.

Have a great Wednesday.



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