Thursday, May 03, 2007

To be Lonely

As of late, I am sooooooooooooooooooooo lonely it's unfathomable (is this a word)
I have no one to talk too in real life.
An occassional phone call here and there.
Kyle is busy and at night when the kids finally fall asleep, he falls asleep.
Some days pass and I can count the number of actual words spoken to an actual person outside of talking to the kids in idle chit chat on one hand.
I don't know what to do.
I wake up out of a dead sleep at night crying and crying because I feel so lonely.
Tonight I was crying because I want some friends, just someone.
I wrote to a very dear soul.
She gets me. I wish she lived closer. :(
She made such sense in her email. The people who don't like me or criticize me, really don't know me.

Melody you are my best friend in the whole wide world. Thank you soooooooooo much for always being there for me.
I love, love ,love you without hesistation.
You make me smile.
There's a special place in heaven for you my friend.

3 comments:

Melzie said...

Dont EVER thank me for being your friend ok? Not necessary :) Love you too chicadee. Prayers for you going up. xoxo melzie

SassyFemme said...

Di, I'm so sorry you're going through this. {{{ }}}

Charmed said...

I know how you feel, and it does get better. Please don't think you are a piece of shit and will never amount to anything. The mind is a powerful tool that can, at times, be your worst enemy. I have felt the same loneliness and I now take Zoloft. It really does help. It doesn't mean you are weak, just human. Hang in there and keep smiling, you have a beautiful daughter to watch grow.